Welcoming the Stranger … and who could be “Strange-er” than your Relatives?
Happy Thanksgiving 🦃 !
“For I was a stranger and you gave me something to eat. I was thirsty and you gave me something to drink. I was a stranger and you welcomed me.” Mt 25:35
“Edward is a vegetarian, doesn’t eat sugar and enjoys periods of being alone. For me this engenders a valuable lesson in hospitality; making guests feel welcome is about allowing them to be who they are, not who you want them to be.” Jana Reiss, Flunking Sainthood
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Even across the miles, I feel you. With the holidays on your doorstep, your emotions are swinging. Excited one minute. Anxious the next. Your sister and her family are finally coming after years of being apart. Your kids and their families are all coming too.
Oh, it’s going to be so awesome … or awful?!! How, exactly, will this go?
This one is gluten free. That one doesn’t do dairy. This one smokes. that one will go into an asthmatic fit if she breathes it. This one talks non-stop. That one is like pulling teeth to have any conversation at all. This one is passionate about politics. That one is appalled if the topic is even brought up.
One family can only stay until 2:00 pm. The other can’t come until 5:00. This one likes to play games. The other believes a great Thanksgiving is all about watching football.
When you think you must’ve gotten the most dysfunctional relatives on the planet, take heart! Peeking into other living rooms the scene would look quite similar.
Friends can seem much easier than relatives to hang out with. The truth is, they’re just as complicated. You just haven’t known them long enough to stub your toe on their baggage yet.
In real life, the people coming to Thanksgiving with their issues, and you with a batch of your own, can be a lot messier than Hallmark movies make it look. But also, much richer. There is untold blessing in these life-long relationships if we can just maneuver the minefield the enemy keeps putting along our path; keeping us all, tied up in knots, fuming over each other’s faults and foibles so we don’t tap into the pure gold of all God created for our relationships to be.
When you dig down deep in your heart, What do you most want this Thanksgiving to be?
If you’re like me, your answer goes something like this…
“I want this time to be full of God’s presence. I want there to be warmth and laughter and for everyone to feel loved.
I imagine us sitting around the table holding hands in prayer before we eat and scattered around the kitchen and living room sipping hot drinks and chatting throughout the day.
No one feels stressed out, threatened or alone...
And everyone feels like they’ve come home.”
I wonder …
Is it just a fairy tale playing out in my mind, or an invitation from God of what he wants to do if I lean in, ask for his instruction and let him lead the way?
I know, this can only happen through his Spirit. Before anything else, I turn to him in prayer,
“Lord, you heard those desires and maybe you even planted them there. But how?”
“Help me God, not to obsess over a meal that’s too grandiose for me to comfortably prepare. or think my house needs to be decorated like Joanna Gaines. Help me to let go of how the day plays out; whether we play games, watch football, chat in the living room, take a walk, move as a group or in small clusters. Help me to be aware that you are orchestrating every moment so I know I don’t have to.
May each person be embraced with their idiosyncrasies and baggage. Heal old wounds. Replace hardened places with compassion and understanding.
Whether they eat the same as I do or stay the amount of time I wish they could, don’t let it ruffle me one bit. May we all enjoy the people in front of us receiving the day’s ebb and flow.
And above all, may each be welcomed at the table with others who are genuinely glad they came.”
Amen.”
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What do you most want this Thanksgiving to be?
~Lori
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Other Thanksgiving articles you may enjoy:
Invitation to Holy Hospitality
What is the Lord Whispering to You this Thanksgiving?